Why Marriage Takes Work

To achieve anything worthwhile takes work.  Why should marriage be any different?

Years of your life are spent in school preparing to obtain the job you want or the career you want to pursue.

If you wanted to excel in sports, art or singing, you were willing to work at it and spend endless hours practicing.  It wasn’t work – it was a joy.

Whatever your dream, nothing would stop you from tirelessly working to achieve your goal even if it meant foregoing certain pleasures and taking extra classes.  You studied and read every book you could find to help you get better and eventually become the person you wanted to be.

Marriage should be approached with as much zeal.  Unfortunately, most people who try their hand at marriage think it’s a learn as you go project.  They “wing it” on a day-to-day basis and fail to see the mistakes made along the way until it ends in separation or divorce.  It’s no secret that more than half of all marriages end in divorce and many others are miserably unhappy.

Marriage is not taken seriously anymore or at least not for long.  As soon as the passion and dedication of the wedding vows fade into the bliss of the honeymoon, couples say well if it doesn’t work out it’s no big deal to go our separate ways.

If children are involved this is certainly not so, but divorce can also have more far reaching effects on others as well.  This includes not only your immediate family but friends as well on both sides of the marriage.

With marriage comes responsibility.  Couples would do well to repeat their wedding vows occasionally, especially the part that says for better or worse.  So often when a marriage gets tough with a loss of job, poor health or unexpected expenses, the stress begins to build and you look for a way out.  Marriage has become too much about what you can do for me, rather than what we can do for each other.

Divorces are too easy to come by.  More work should have gone into the engagement period which most times are all too brief.  The longer the engagement the more you can learn about your partner.

If there are little things (or big things) that annoy you it’s better to discover them before the vows are said.  Going into marriage thinking you can change someone most of the time is a fairy tale.

Just like you prepare for a career, you should prepare for marriage.  Premarital counseling could be extremely beneficial.  It not only brings couples closer but enables them to discover what the other person is seeking or expects in a relationship.  In a counseling situation most feel more comfortable sharing their feelings with a professional present.

Enter into the sanctity of marriage knowing that it’s a lifetime commitment.  Together you can accomplish so much more than alone.  It will take work and self sacrifice.  The marriage highway is filled with bumps and potholes but it’s a trip worth taking and may be the best journey of your life.

Posted in: Marriage Help